Heaven snippets

Have I mentioned my child has a slight obsession with death? Scratch that. Let's instead call it a healthy curiosity about heaven. Whatever the case, I wanted to document just a few (yes there were many more) of the questions Isla has asked me over the last two days:

Why is Daddy not dead?
When are we going to die?
Are the angels boys or girls?
How many angels are there?
Why did Jesus die on Calvary?
How come we're not going to wear clothes when we go to Jesus' house?
Will there be birthdays there?
Will there be beds?
Have just a few people died? Tell me their names.
Why are my grandma and grandpa not dead?

Just a typical Wednesday over here...Please tell me your three year old asked you these same questions today too.

Isla: 41 Months

Some tidbits about Isla this month:

-She no longer sleeps with Ducky!

-One of her favorite pastimes involves being tucked into bed, finding a good reason to get back out and then yelling to be re-tucked back it. Repeat x 3.

-She likes drinking out of a straw. Sometimes two.

-She's the bravest of ballerinas after overcoming the initial pre-class jitters ("I don't waaaaaaaant to go to my dance class!") She now eagerly looks forward to Wednesdays and (I think) is learning how to follow directions. She loves to show me her "new moves" like "the pizza slice" and we are now playing pretend dance class. Somehow this is the best dance attire picture we've captured thus far: 

-She changes her clothes approximately 5 times daily and is constantly asking to change into a different dress. 

-Is quite warm-blooded and can frequently be found wearing tank tops and sundresses.

-Nap time is now "quiet time." An awake 3 year old at 10:30 PM helped me make this decision.

-She is showing us a whole new side to her: a strong sense of worry and concern. Most often it is related to the safety of her sister and on the one hand it is very sweet but it is also a little alarming to see how stressed she becomes when Emma walks more than 5 feet away from us in public places.

-Despite her growing sense of anxiety, she's still a playful kid at heart!  

-She loves:

-learning what different words are in Spanish

-asking when our birthdays are

-staying home (or so she says)

-being in charge
-having Mom and mom ONLY put her to bed

-talking about Mickey Mouse and heaven

-trying to figure out who my Grandpa and Grandma Wilson are 

-praying before meals: "Dear God, Thank you for this food and for this day and that we could be together as a family. Amen!"

Thanks

One big giant THANKS to all of you who have reached out to me in the past 36 hours! I am so grateful for the prayers and company and offers of help. I must confess I feel a bit sheepish for waving my white flag so publicly but it has been a good reminder to me of how many wonderful people we have in our lives to help share the load when the going gets tough. Last night I was invited to dinner at a friend's followed by a chick flick while Graham was in class. Today I got to spend time and eat lunch with my nephew and brother and sister-in-law. Tonight another friend has offered to bring dinner and help me put the kids to bed. And then I just got off the phone my wonderful mother-in-law who called to see if she could come watch the girls so I could go to Starbucks (this after already watching the girls Saturday night through Monday AND with plans in place to watch them for a couple hours tomorrow and Monday). I feel like I just had a baby or something but no, I've just had a hard week! You all are incredible!

Today's devotional in the book Jesus Calling was perfect for where I have been at this week: 

"Through the intimacy of our relationship, you are being transformed from the inside out. As you keep your focus on Me, I form you into the one I desire you to be. Your part is to yield to My creative work in you, neither resisting it nor trying to speed it up. Enjoy the tempo of a God-breathed life by letting Me set the pace. Hold my hand in child-like trust, and the way before you will open up step by step."

This was an important reminder for me that God is at work even amidst what feels like craziness and chaos. That I need to continue to seek him and allow him to lead and change me (though the process may not always be fun!) AND to let him set the pace. In the meantime, I'm so thankful for the very tangible from you all that I am loved. 

Hard

This is one of those weeks where the heaviness of all I am managing, coordinating, taking care of feels almost too much to bear. It's not as if anything out of the ordinary happened this week (well except I suppose that I'm working half time this month instead of 1/3 time...) but it just feels overwhelming. Graham and I try our best to alternate who gets to feel overwhelmed when as it's never pretty when we both feel like we're drowning. I guess we didn't coordinate this week very well.

The funny part about all this is that when I weighed and processed all that grad school would mean for me and my family, it never crossed my mind that loneliness would be an issue. And it feels weird to even call it loneliness because in actuality, I'm rarely ever alone. It hit me especially hard tonight as I was finally able to attack the dinner mess just before 8 PM after doing all the dinner prep, feeding, picking up toys, bathing, teeth brushing, story reading and bedtime process alone for the umpteenth time. I just don't want to do it by myself anymore! I seriously do not know how single moms do it! The hours between 4 and 7:30 PM go by slower than a slug and I struggle through them every day.

So, if we're being honest, grad school and I aren't getting along so well right now. I'm ready to have my husband back! I know this post isn't pretty but it's real and I'm feeling passionate about authenticity. We are almost there. We will get there. Prayers appreciated!

Butternut Squash and Kale Quesadillas

Sometimes when I'm feeling stressed out, I find it therapeutic to blog about food. Or to just eat food (unfortunately usually the latter). We had a rough day here but at least dinner was a success which means I have a delicious recipe to share. 

It actually all started with the Pioneer Woman's Shrimp Tacos that I made last week when my husband requested said dish for his half birthday dinner. All he told me was that he wanted shrimp tacos and I happened upon Ree Drummond's version. I must confess I was a bit skeptical when I saw they called for canned enchilada sauce oh but they did not disappoint! The recipe made a bucket load of pico de gallo, so I was looking for creative ways to utilize the leftovers when I stumbled upon another one of the Pioneer Woman's recipes. Graham has a little food crush on her, probably because she uses SO. MUCH. BUTTER. and, I'm a sucker for making my husband happy so I put three of her dishes on the menu this week (they have all been really yummy).

Tonight I made her quesadillas (with a few tweaks of my own to make them healthier) and served them with my leftover homemade pico. They were the best quesadillas I have ever eaten. HAVE I MENTIONED THAT I LOVE KALE!?! I know it is all the rage these days and I am eating it up. Quite literally. (We may have eaten 3 bunches in 2 days...) Oh and also, hello monterey jack cheese! Goodbye cheddar! I've discovered the quesadilla's new best friend.

Butternut Squash and Kale Quesadillas 

(adapted from The Pioneer Woman)

1/2 whole Butternut Squash, peeled, seeded, and diced into 1/2-inch cubes

1 Tablespoon Butter

2 Tablespoon Olive Oil

1/2 teaspoon Kosher Salt

Black Pepper to taste

1/2 teaspoon Chili Powder (more to taste)

1 bunch Kale, leaves torn, stalks discarded

8 whole small (fajita Sized) whole wheat flour tortillas

2-1/2 cups Monterey Jack Cheese, grated (more if needed)

Light Sour Cream for serving

Cilantro, for serving

Pico De Gallo, Salsa, Avocado Slices (optional) for serving

Heat 1 tablespoon butter and 1 tablespoon olive oil in a large skillet over high heat. Add squash and sprinkle with salt, pepper, and chili powder. Cook for several minutes, turning gently with a spatula, until squash is deep golden brown and tender (but not falling apart.) Remove to a plate and set aside.

In the same skillet, heat remaining 1 tablespoon of olive oil over medium-high heat and add in the kale. Toss it around with tongs and cook it for 3 to 4 minutes. Add in the cooked squash and gently toss together. Set aside.

In a separate skillet, melt additional butter (I used only 1/2 tsp + some cooking spray) and lightly brown both sides of the 8 tortillas. Build the quesadillas one by one by adding a layer of cheese topped with a layer of the squash/kale mixture, topped with a second tortilla.

Brown each quesadilla on both sides to make sure tortillas are nice and golden and yummy.

When the cheese is melted, remove each quesadilla from the skillet and cut it into four wedges. Serve with sour cream, cilantro, pico de gallo, salsa and avocado.

Butternut Squash & Kale Quesadillas

Sometimes when I'm feeling stressed out, I find it therapeutic to blog about food. Or to just eat food (unfortunately usually the latter). We had a rough day here but at least dinner was a success which means I have a delicious recipe to share. 

It actually all started with the Pioneer Woman's Shrimp Tacos that I made last week when my husband requested said dish for his half birthday dinner. All he told me was that he wanted shrimp tacos and I happened upon Ree Drummond's version. I must confess I was a bit skeptical when I saw they called for canned enchilada sauce oh but they did not disappoint! The recipe made a bucket load of pico de gallo, so I was looking for creative ways to utilize the leftovers when I stumbled upon another one of the Pioneer Woman's recipes. Graham has a little food crush on her, probably because she uses SO. MUCH. BUTTER. and, I'm a sucker for making my husband happy so I put three of her dishes on the menu this week (they have all been really yummy).

Tonight I made her quesadillas (with a few tweaks of my own to make them healthier) and served them with my leftover homemade pico. They were the best quesadillas I have ever eaten. HAVE I MENTIONED THAT I LOVE KALE!?! I know it is all the rage these days and I am eating it up. Quite literally. (We may have eaten 3 bunches in 2 days...) Oh and also, hello monterey jack cheese! Goodbye cheddar! I've discovered the quesadilla's new best friend.

Butternut Squash and Kale Quesadillas 

Ingredients

1/2 whole Butternut Squash, peeled, seeded, and diced into 1/2-inch cubes

1 Tablespoon Butter

2 Tablespoon Olive Oil

1/2 teaspoon Kosher Salt

 Black Pepper to taste

1/2 teaspoon Chili Powder (more to taste)

1 bunch Kale, leaves torn, stalks discarded

8 whole small (fajita Sized) whole wheat flour tortillas

2-1/2 cups Monterey Jack Cheese, grated (more if needed)

Sour Cream for serving

Cilantro, for serving

Pico De Gallo, Salsa, Avocado Slices (optional) for serving

Preparation Instructions

Heat 1 tablespoon butter and 1 tablespoon olive oil in a large skillet over high heat. Add squash and sprinkle with salt, pepper, and chili powder. Cook for several minutes, turning gently with a spatula, until squash is deep golden brown and tender (but not falling apart.) Remove to a plate and set aside.

In the same skillet, heat remaining 1 tablespoon of olive oil over medium-high heat and add in the kale. Toss it around with tongs and cook it for 3 to 4 minutes. Add in the cooked squash and gently toss together. Set aside.

In a separate skillet, melt additional butter (I used only 1/2 tsp + some cooking spray) and lightly brown both sides of the 8 tortillas. Build the quesadillas one by one by adding a layer of cheese topped with a layer of the squash/kale mixture, topped with a second tortilla.

Brown each quesadilla on both sides to make sure tortillas are nice and golden and yummy.

When the cheese is melted, remove each quesadilla from the skillet and cut it into four wedges. Serve with sour cream, cilantro, pico de gallo, salsa and avocado.

Aquarium

Ever since Emma perfected her fish face, we've been wanting to take her to the Aquarium. Enough of the fish tank at the doctor's office, it was time for the real thing! Of course she loved it and practically dove right in at the tide pool exhibit. I'm not kidding! She had a ball reaching in and splashing like crazy. I drew the line though when she starting trying to drink it. Yuck.

Isla was a little more timid but did eventually reach in and touch a starfish with some coaxing.

Her favorite was watching the diver in the giant tank

Riding in style

We ate a picnic lunch in the large dome tank with fish swimming overhead.

 This guy just parked himself on the wall and stayed there the entire time. 

Such a fun break from our normal every day life (insert fish face here).

That crazy itch

The itch is back.

The last time it made it's appearance we ended up blowing our tax return and galavanting around France for 3 weeks with an 8 month old.

The itch is probably not healthy.

But the side effects are oh so very fun.

Speaking of, tax return season is coming soon. Hmm.....

Friends

And I mean really, really good friends. They are hard to come by but once you find them, you've gottta keep 'em! If only we lived closer! It all started with these 5 college housemates:

Add some beautiful wives...(thank you SPU for 3 of us couples!)

And then THIS happens:

Us 6 couples and NINE children were able to gather for a few hours over Christmas for a brief catch-up. The last time we were all together was 2 years ago and at that time there were only 2 kids. TWO! (Well, actually I had JUST found out I was pregnant with Emma and almost died keeping it a secret and Kaytee found out she was pregnant a couple days later.) I'd say we should go into baby-makin' business because we know how to be fruitful and multiply!

 It was so wonderful to be able to see all of our friends' kids, some of whom we met for the first time (Lamaya above). Emma and Lucy girl are already buds (10 days apart!) as we've been able to see each other 3 times so far in their short lives.

 There is nothing cuter than men going crazy over babies!

Graham could so handle having twins (it's just me that couldn't)

We got to meet this adorable ball of blond-hair blue-eyed cuteness (Geoffrey) for the first time. 

Isla and Maddie were fast buds and Isla is now asking to move to California where Maddie lives.

Glendon & Lamaya

A fun shot of all the cooking, chatting and baby holding and feeding that went on that evening

We ate pizza together, managed to put 5 of the 9 kids down for the night and then laughed our way through a white elephant gift exchange. I left our gathering feel blessed and sad all at the same time.   I could have spent a week with these people! Graham lived with the guys while we were dating and they played a huge role in building and supporting our relationship. Jackie & Brant get the credit for dragging me on our first double dates with Graham (though I was determined NOT to like him) and Glendon always looked out for Graham by asking me "What are your intentions with this man?" Only with this group can we go two years between gatherings and still go deep right away. Here's to many more years and many more babies!

And finally....."Christmas"

 Look how big my family is getting! I just love it! I promise this will be the last of my Christmas posts but I just couldn't resist posting pictures of our actual gift-opening "Christmas" day with the Wilson side. Even after 3 nights with this crew, I still didn't have my fill. Highlights of the day included dress up clothes for Isla (thanks Uncle Ben!), watching my Dad tear up as he opened the canvas portraits of his grandchildren (thanks to the talented John Crozier) and just plain being together as a family of 4 and as extended family of 13! I'll let the pictures tell the rest.

 

 

 

12 Days of Christmas!

We really celebrated "The 12 Days of Christmas" this year! With Graham working on the 24th and 25th, we "moved" Christmas Eve to the 25th and Christmas to the 26th. But then we it felt wrong not to do anything on the 24th so we sort of celebrated Christmas Eve twice. Then there was real Christmas. And "fake" Christmas. And Crozier "fake" Christmas. It kind of felt like the movie Groundhog Day except with Christmas'. Every day Isla woke up asking if it was Christmas and we just answered "yes!" My whole family was able to gather up in Bellingham for a couple of nights to celebrate. We spent leisurely days playing at Grandpa and Grandma's while waiting for Graham to drive up from Bellevue in the evenings (he was a commuting trooper!) Activities included a Christmas Eve service at my parents' church, delicious meals, a surprise outing (in PJs!) to see Christmas lights, and baking and eating a birthday cake for Jesus. Here's some of my favorite shots of the 2 days leading up to "Christmas":